Can you grab your hymnal…the Psalm for today is Psalm 139. They got creative with our hymnal, and decided that since the book of Psalms is the “original hymnal”, the Psalms would be the first 150 hymns in our book. So find Psalm 139 with me.
Let’s read the first 12 verses responsively — I’ll start.
O Lord, you have searched me and known me.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from far away.
3 You search out my path and my lying down,
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 Even before a word is on my tongue,
O Lord, you know it completely.
5 You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is so high that I cannot attain it.
7 Where can I go from your spirit?
Or where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I ascend to heaven, you are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning
and settle at the farthest limits of the sea,
10 even there your hand shall lead me,
and your right hand shall hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light around me become night,”
12 even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is as bright as the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
I love this Psalm. The heart of it is that we are known. God knows us inside and out. There is nothing about us God does not know…no insecurity or fear…no ugliness in us that God is not intimately familiar with. God knows our pettiest thoughts and our most shame-filled secrets. Now, this would terrifying if we imagined God was disgusted by us…that God was put off by our deepest selves, and would reject us as unworthy. But that is not the case. The God revealed in this psalm knows us…and loves us. Forms us and tenderly cares for us. Even our despair, our darkness…is understood and known..and God is not worried about it. God’s still got us, even then…God’s right hand holds us fast. Even then, God’s light shines for us.
I came across a quote this week that hooked me — Rev. Tim Keller wrote — “To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything.”
So many people believe they are loved superficially. They believe they are loved only because others don’t really know them completely.
I cannot tell you how many times I have told a kid…or an adult…how beautiful they are, inside and out…or how awesome they are…or how much they matter…or how much good they have inside them…only to have them roll their eyes at me. “If you only knew”….
They are so sure that if people really knew what was inside them…they wouldn’t like them…or love them as much…or at all. And so they are deathly afraid of exposing themselves to others…because what on earth could be worse that laying yourself bare…and being rejected? Being known and not loved…is our greatest fear…no doubt.
But the good news of Jesus…is that you are known….and loved.
This is what Nathanael experiences in our gospel story today…and it moves him from doubt to faith. Nathaniel is petty and bigoted and judgmental — ‘what good could come out of a dung-filled place like Nazareth?’, he asks when Philip wants him to come and meet Jesus. But he goes along…and is surprised to find that Jesus is indeed everything Philip said…he is the promised one…the one they’ve all been waiting for. The Son of God. The King of Israel. And Nathanael knows it….because most importantly, he is the one Nathanael has been waiting for. Because here is the one who knows Nathanael…knows him inside and out …even knows his ugly words spewed to Philip under a fig tree…and still wants him. Still invites him to be his disciple. Still loves him. For the first time, he is fully known and truly loved…this is God stuff indeed.
This gospel is about Jesus who has no illusions about who people are — he sees them clearly, at their worst, even….and calls them worthy to be his disciples. This is God who knows us inside and out…and calls us beautiful children of God.
This is God, who knows we do petty, cheap and ugly things…God, from whom nothing is hidden…and who still loves us deeply. Completely.
This is how God transforms Nathanael. This is how God transforms us.
God is intimately involved in your life. Everything you do…according to Paul…God does. With you. You are part of God’s holy body in this world….God’s holy creation…God’s holy incarnation. You matter. You are beautiful. You are good. You are a child of God. Whether you believe it or live it or not.
But when we do believe…when we do meet Jesus and realize that we are enough for God…that we are beloved by God…then maybe, we can begin to love others as well. To love others as they are, not for who we want them to be. To see God in them. To see beauty in them. To treat them with kindness and respect and understanding. Because when we do, the angels descend among us. When we do, heaven opens, and God is revealed in our midst. When we do, we follow Jesus. Like Nathanael.
And that’s what Jesus asks us to do, after all…to follow him.
But just in case we forget…Nathanael followed Jesus on a road that led to the cross. Choosing to love people, imperfect people, can hurt us. Choosing not to hate, choosing not to define people by the worst thing they have ever done, choosing to see people…all people…as children of God…will always bring us into conflict with those whose hearts are filled with hate and fear and anger.
It is Martin Luther King, Jr weekend…and his words as a pastor who strived to follow Jesus, are still challenging and inspiring and transforming America. He, again and again, reminded people that hate and violence and arrogance will never bring a better world…only love can do that. He reminded us that “Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend.” He was not perfect…but he trusted God’s perfect love. God’s love for him and for ALL people. He trusted that love was the only way forward. And it got him killed.
Following Jesus….loving others, imperfect as they may be, like Jesus loved…is hard stuff. But God thinks we can do it. And so God calls each and every one of us….the Samuels and Nathanael’s … the young and old….the very human and very unsure….the ignorant and the arrogant. God, who knows us intimately…and loves us completely…calls us just as we are…to love one another as we have been loved…because “that IS what we need more than anything.” In fact, that is how God saves the world. Amen.
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